jelas.info

This letter was not selected for publication, and I must say I’m a little disappointed – worked quite hard at it, and was really a delight to write :P :) In the off chance you enjoy it, do help spread – mebbe it’ll even reach the man’s eyes himself :P

Dear Mr. De Niro,

I have a proposal for you good sir.

But first: how exciting to hear that you may have quietly slipped into Malaysia for a visit under an assumed identity this last weekend!

We are told you made this visit at the behest of our self-proclaimed First Lady, Her Excellency Datin Seri Paduka Rosmah Mansor.

She tells us you met in New York, and quotes you as telling her that “You are very progressive, you are very engaging. I would like to come to your country.”

I confess, I can’t possibly imagine you using such language, and have a hard time believing you would say such things given first, your intelligence, and second, the available facts regarding the person in question and our country’s rather abominable record of civil and political rights.

But let’s leave all that boring, serious stuff aside; I can’t help but be excited that you’ve been here, and your visit has emboldened me to ask – would you like to star in a movie I’m planning?

I know it’s a long shot, but I’ve read about your willingness to engage in social and political issues, and perhaps you have a newfound interest in Southeast Asia that you might care to indulge.

The heart of my story is a meditation on ambition. I want to explore what motivates people (in politics in particular) to chase the things they do, how they evolve once they get them, and the lengths they will go to preserve what they’ve obtained.

At the center of this tale is a husband and wife, rising to political power in a fictional Southeast Asian nation. The story begins as the husband finally ascends to the highest political office in the land. We then trace the ‘adventures’ this couple goes through as a result of this ascension.

Inspiration for these two lead characters are taken from various personae within the region throughout history.

I imagine the husband to be a lacklustre, it not entirely witless, timid man, who has finally managed to occupy the number one seat through a combination of patience, a refusal to stick his neck out, and incessant fuedalistic patronage. With little appetite for blood, his weapon of choice is money (and lots of it) and his primary weakness is the fairer sex.

This however, is hardly reflected in his choice of mate. A second marriage for both, this union is clearly one of political alliance, rather than any form of attraction or affection.

He is the son of a former premier, and she sees him as the perfect raw material to be moulded under her manipulative care. Here, I am thinking of the dynamic between Lady Macbeth and her husband in the early part of the play.

As you may be aware, politicians in my neck of the woods are world famous for kleptocracy of unimaginable scale – we’re up there with the worst of African despots. Why, only recently we read of some USD 55 billion mysteriously disappearing over time in shady defence contracts (the husband’s previous ministry is Defence, of course).

I think this will be an important part of the movie – we must explore these shady deals, the wheeling and dealing in dimly lit hotel lounges; the suitcases of cash; the beautiful women in elegant red dresses.

All this runs rampant because a great culture of secrecy exists in this fictional nation, where information is controlled meticulously and jealously – not at all unlike the Britain protrayed in “Brazil” (although far less bureaucratic; we don’t want to be sued by the Singapore government), where all call out for a Harry Tuttle.

So, our husband and wife have done deal after deal, skimmed more than a little of uncountable tops, and have finally arrived at their goal.

Slowly, both husband and wife start to cut loose. The latter starts daydreaming the recognition that comes from rubbing shoulders with the most glamorous glitterati of the world. We’re not talking about faded movie stars or socialites, we’re talking Al Pacino, Oprah, Kanye West and the like.

Perhaps the couple will have a wayward son, who goes on champagne buying sprees around the globe with controversial Hollywood starlets.

Meanwhile, our husband starts cavourting with wilder and wilder women – one encounter ending in pregnancy and a rather belligerent young mistress going around threatening to expose everything.

The wife of course is not having any of this – there’s no way she would allow some young tart to destroy all that they’ve worked for.

In a manner that I must stress is not at all in any way, shape or form inspired by true events, the wife then proceeds to arrange for the mistress to be killed, and her body detonated in some far off jungle (death is not enough after all, all traces of the pregnancy must be destroyed).

The fallout is serious, but the couple’s tight grip on the media eventually allows them to get their personal bodyguards charged and convicted for the crime (even though those poor fellows had no discernible motive whatsoever), while the only potential witness to the murder is hauled in for questioning by the authorities only to be found having mysteriously fallen to his death from the fourteenth floor of the building in which he was being interrogated.

(No one is charged – the death is passed off as suicide, notwithstanding the fact that the poor fellow was due to get married the following week.)

Anyhow, enough about poor fellows.

So husband and wife are now facing pesky writers on the internet who keep stirring shit and calling attention to issues like these deaths, shady acuqisitions of jet fighters that don’t fly, and missing submarine engines, along with a huge scam involving some free zone port.

To battle all this bad press, the couple decides to call in the big guns to repair their image. Having been in politics so long by now, their belief is that all they need to control and change is public perception, rather than anything genuine.

They go for the best money can buy, which in this case is a Washington-based lobbying and public relations firm called OCPA, globally renowned for doing the dirty work of image revamps for dictators, despots and tyrants the world over.

I was wondering if you might be interested in playing a wheeler-dealer from OCPA? After all, the rise to prominence, influence and power of such firms in America is something I imagine you’re familiar with, and I think it would be interesting to explore their growing role in third world politics.

I think the perfect reference point for such a character, if you don’t mind reprising a role somewhat, is spin doctor Conrad Brean from “Wag the Dog”. In fact, I must credit the idea behind that movie as a major influence.

Back to the story. Our couple pays OCPA a huge ton of money, and before long there’s a new, feel good OneNation campaign that sweeps the country, our husband starts appearing in major Western newspapers, meets Obama, and so on.

Our wife meanwhile, really starts to party it up, with her new OCPA friends being perfectly trained to cater to all her celebrity fantasies. Lavish parties are arranged for, and all the who’s who who may have never heard of our little Southeast Asian nation before are suddenly honoured guests at dinners to fete the awarding of an off-the-shelf award created by an OCPA-like organisation to our thrilled wife.

Perhaps you can even play yourself at such an event? It’d be amazing if we can get Kanye to emcee.

I can’t hide much longer though – I think I must reveal one of my major inspirations for this character. There is obviously, after all, the wife of a Southeast Asian leader who fits the bill quite closely.

A lady famed for extravagance and indulgent, “image-boosting” events; a thirst for celebrity hobnobbing that belies at best insecurity, and at worst, shameless pandering; seen by her subjects the same way Marie Antoinette was seen by the French public; a woman with a promiscuous husband whose mistress she wanted to kill; and of course, most of all, the real power behind the throne.

Yes, I’m talking about Imelda Marcos.

Yes, the lady who wrote the book where squandering millions meant for the poor on fluff is concerned. In fact, I confess that this movie is driven by the same questions posed in an article by Lance Morrow, in Time Magazine, back in 1986, when the Marcos empire finally began to unravel (as these things inevitably do) – an attempt to understand the nature of truly excessive high-brow, debauchery.

Imelda apparently had a very close friendship with George Hamilton. Perhaps you might consider playing the role of such a ‘celebrity sidekick’ as well. Most people wouldn’t associate the great Robert De Niro with that kind of flamboyance, but I think your brilliant performance in “Stardust” has put to rest any doubts as to your versatility.

We can’t reference her directly of course, but perhaps we can give her a similar sounding name. Rosmelda perhaps? As for Ferdinand, somehow the name Ferdinajib comes to mind, but that probably just sounds too ridiculous.

In any case, if you know of anyone, even if mere recent acquaintances, who might be right for the part, I’m more than happy to take recommendations. In keeping with a sense of realism and for practical purposes, I think we can forego any requirement that the actress look like a former beauty queen.

How does the movie end? I’m toying with the idea of a people power revolution that toppled the real Imelda Marcos, but ironically, I’m not entirely sure how true to life that would be. Not yet, anyway.

Perhaps something more poignant? I confess, “The Mission” is one of my favourite movies – one perhaps that contains subtle hope amidst persistent hopelessness. Perhaps an ending along those lines might hit home a little better; although, I’m not sure whether our characters will go through the same journey of redemption yours did.

In any case, once again Mr. De Niro, a belated welcome to our shores. I’ll look forward to your favourable reply!

I thought I’d reproduce a post by YB Hannah showing a good contrast of public expenditure before and after 2008, enjoy :)

The complete restoration of Millennium Park

Year 2008

This was how Millennium Park looked like when we first took over the State Government in 2008. The former Barisan Nasional government spent millions decorating this open space with silver birds and trees which disappeared soon after and then they allowed this valuable open space to become an eatery, which was also abandoned.

In 2008, my office wrote to MPSJ and requested for the abandoned structures to be demolished.

Year 2009

On World Environment Day in June 2009, a huge tree planting exercise was carried out together with JKP Zone 1, SJRA, USJ RA, BSRA, corporate sponsors and MPSJ.

Residents participated in restoring the Millennium Park into a green area.

Year 2010

Now that the place is restored, I organised a healthy living campaign for my residents. A qualified trainer will lead the residents all over DUN Subang Jaya every Saturday from 7:30am to 8:00am in an exercise session. This program will be on-going for half a year and is sponsored by my office using the annual allocation given by the Selangor State Government for less than RM10,000.

Early sunrise

Residents from all races and all ages (see kids in the pic) come out every Saturday for this exercise program. Last week, the group has grown to a size of 60 people. Most of them come from the SS13 flats nearby. Others from all over Subang Jaya, USJ and Bandar Sunway. Join us if you can!

I am a firm believer that taxpayers funds must return to the people for their benefit. BN spent millions and benefited only the recipient of the contract. We spent RM10,000 only for this exercise program and the residents walk away happy and healthier every week!

Wanted to give as much support as I can to Zunar and Malaysiakini, who are challenging the ban of their books in court.

I think a major reason they’ve come down so unreasonably hard on these guys is because comics are truly powerful tools of communication.

See how effectively and instantly they put a message across? I love it.

I was fortunate enough to be invited by YB Iskandar via YB Eli to do a short sharing with PAS Chempaka on political communication last night, which I enjoyed immensely. Comics were one of the tools I touted as effective and underused.

Terima kasih atas jemputan!

Zunar has helped nurture a full-on cadre/generation of cartoonists, and I do hope they keep up the good work :)

ps- Was happy to get a comment from Patrick Saw, whose iconic T-shirts are truly a familiar sight to many :) Encouraged by the strength of his support! His famous shirts:

Sigh. Looks like this blog is going to degenerate into some sort of Jho gossip rag :P First some pics you might’ve seen already, and then some you probably have not re: more Rosmah debauchary.

(ps- is all this just jealousy? You bet. You’ll probably catch me doing worse some day. Just. Hopefully. Not on the rakyat’s dime).

So, just after we read this:

Malaysian millionaire Taek Jho Low has been asked by his father to lie low after news of him and American party girl Paris Hilton exploded on the media worldwide.

His father, a businessman, told Sin Chew Daily he had told his son to be cautious with his words and actions.

We get wind of this:

Ah, see that last one? One day I will be part of the entourage – probably the hamsuplo on the bottom right. Flers fingers like mine, mebbe more ways than one :P

These pictures were reportedly taken at Byblos Nightclub in Saint Tropez. Don’t ask me where that is – not rich or famous enough to know :) This gossip site (with quite the picture) has the amount spent that night at 1.8 million POUNDS (RM 8.8 million today, if you’re counting. In. A. Single. Night.). Erk.

Eh, but you all don’t hate on Jho so much k? Mebbe it’s true love:

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

CAPTION CONTEST TIME! haha :)

The other thing I came across over the weekend were photos taken during a “Faces of 1Malaysia” dinner was held at the Mandarin Oriental in Washington DC on April 13th, 2010.

These pictures feature, of all people, Stevie Wonder!

Haha, no that video was not from the event. But these pics apparently were:

Do I have any way of proving this wasn’t just some other dinner? Nope, can’t say I do, but if anyone wants to deny it, please feel free.

As I said before, there’s generally no harm in indulging in all sorts of debauchary – I’m no moralist in that regard. That said though:

1. This is the PM and his wife we’re talking about.

2. How much is all this costing WHO exactly?

I think the latter question is the one and only thing that justifies our continued attention.

This obssession with celebrities must also give us pause as to the nature of the second couple – what their priorities are in life, what they want to spend money on, and how they go about spending that money.

More thoughts on these to come soon I hope.

Oh! And I almost forgot. A great little bird from the UK sent me a press statement from the Bruno Manser Fund today:

The Oxford University’s Saïd Business School has come under fire over an invitation extended to Taib Mahmud, the controversial Chief Minister of the Malaysian state of Sarawak. Taib Mahmud will present an opening address at the “Oxford Global Islamic Branding and Marketing Forum” to be held on 26-27 July 2010. British civil society groups have announced a protest rally for tomorrow morning, 26 July 2010, in front of the Saïd Business School.

According to a joint NGO statement, which will be released tomorrow, Taib is “one of Asia’s greatest kleptocrats” who has “systematically plundered the rich Borneo jungles for timber”. “Most of the state of Sarawak has been illegally absorbed into the possession of his cronies and family members through ‘privatisations’ and the handing out of palm oil and timber concessions, via arbitrary state acquisitions of native lands.” This has resulted in “environmental destruction, serious human rights violations and poverty.”

By inviting Taib Mahmud as a keynote speaker, the Saïd Business School is not only offending Sarawak’s native communities and Malaysia’s civil rights movement but is also betraying the Oxford University’s integrity and academic tradition.

Right on the money.

And oh, how did Taib get this invitation in the first place?

I don’t suppose it has anything to do with oh, I don’t know, Washington based lobbying firms perhaps? Ones with secretaries named Jo maybe?

As the cliche has it, the plot thickens.

ps- Must highlight a follow-up from Wendy Brandes, who was quoted as an eyewitness source from last post. Thanks Wendy!

I’m glad you find my telling of the story amusing! I can assure you every word of it is true and even understated. As you say, I’m a complete outsider and have no agenda. I did try to stay polite, since I was an invited guest, and not speculate on how all those celebrities came to be there. It was one of the most peculiar events I had ever been to and I’m not surprised that it’s become part of a larger issue.

pps- Neverending supply of pics. More here

Thanks for all comments on the Low Taek Jho post. Needless to say, anyone living that kind of life is bound to attract attention.

I must admit, we have no solid proof of anything – just a lot of very suspicious coincidences. I must also say, I think The Nutgraph has covered almost everything I am writing about helow.

That said, allow me to add something quite new to that list. Observe a comment received on said post:

i have handle Low Taek Jho account before in Singapore. I cannot reveal his personal details as is private and confidential. He has various bank accounts assigned with banker gurantee to secure overdraft fundings for his expenditure.

He spends consistantly 2 million approx every month. I am quite surprise he have such a high value network even within the banking line to secure higher extension on his credit. he does not have any income support from Singapore, i am surprise he can get such a high priority account on his age. I know many tycoon accounts but they don’t spend like him.

My concern about him was many transaction was made was high risk charges like Casino transactional payments and also High expenses on jewellary. Howveer no one in our company have questions his spending as he has consistant payments made regularly.

He travel extensively around the world. He have many first class tickets prebooked and paid for his extensive travelling. I felt his main base is in Las Vegas mainly since early 2010. My gut instinct tells me this man is doing money laundering with the unusual spending pattern history on his account.

He is basically low profile customer. and only calls in when he is seeking to extend more funds on his account. i can’t say more. Only time and justice can tell if he misused funds.. or he have a lucky break securing a big contract from the govement of Malaysia. Overrall he is soft spoken online. May god reveal the truth when time comes.

Youch. I think that’s quite a high level of detail, don’t you? Does that sound like someone who is spending his own money?

I wonder whether this sort of info is the kinda thing that gets you (me?) landed in jail.

In any case, fun as it is to dig at this guy (I get the feeling he’s in some trouble now), it wouldn’t do to lose sight of the bigger picture – our interest in him should not be limited to his Mr. Paris Hilton status, but rather how he reveals all sorts of sketchy links.

What got the latest Jho ball rolling, was The Nutgraph’s revelation of an email slip-up by a Henry Thomas Jones of one Laurus Group.

What was that? Laurus mentioned in a Malaysiakini expose bylined by Steven Gan himself?

Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak paid RM50,000 (US$15,000) to a Washington-based political consultant in April this year in an attempt to get an opinion-editorial article written by him published in one of the major newspapers in the United States.

And should the article eventually appear in print, the prime minister will have to fork out an additional RM50,000 as a ‘success fee’ to the consultant.

This is revealed in documents filed under the Foreign Agents Registration Act by Quinn Gillespie & Associates (QGA), a top public relations and lobbying firm in Washington DC.

According to the documents obtained by Malaysiakini, QGA was assigned by another consultancy firm, The Laurus Group, to try and convince a major US newspaper to carry Najib’s article.

The Laurus Group, an obscure public relations firm whose website is still under construction, had apparently been hired by the Malaysian government to provide ‘public relations services’ during Najib’s week-long trip to Washington DC and New York from April 10 to 16 this year.

Goodness me. To top it off, Malaysiakini has the down and dirty in black and white:

While the Jho/Joh link is still speculative (although this “receptionist” business is quite implausible), I think it is becoming clear that the Laurus group is very much involved in a hard sell by the Najib administration to gain popularity overseas – popularity he is probably paranoid-ly afraid of losing to Anwar.

Laurus and this QGA join APCO in being the latest of a legion of Washington based consultants that Najib is throwing millions upon millions of our money, in the belief that he does not have to be a quality leader – he only needs to be seen as one, by the ‘right’ people.

While APCO is clearly the worst of this particular lot, this entire ‘political consulting’ and ‘lobbying’ industry is a mega con-job that represents the worst in politics.

In Washington, it is perhaps one of the biggest ways politicians from both sides of the divide make sure they get a (considerable) slice of the cake – a cake that belongs to you and me. I daresay it is a huge complot by the rich (politicians, business, media, etc) to stay that way at the expense of the poor (yaya, I will probably join them one day, sigh).

It seems very appropriate that Najib & Rosmah would want to throw in their lot with these ‘types’ – it fits their image perfectly.

At the risk of sounding unflattering or snobbish, I daresay they are some cross between thieves and bumpkins who have come into a lot of money, and now want to hobnob with the ‘respectable’ crowd. (think Beverly Hillbillies, but without the good heart and cuteness).

Instead of focusing on what is really respectable in the hearts of the rakyat, Najib/Rosmah/Jho only have eyes for the gliteratti of celebrities (and the occasional model/translator perhaps).

Cases in point are Martha Stewart, and most recently – wonder of wonders – Robert DeNiro??

That’s got to be a new level of absurdity. At some point, perhaps I’ll compose something to him directly.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, we’re belatedly uncovering some rather….. once again, ‘absurd’ seems to be the best word, along with ‘undignified’ perhaps…. details regarding the party in which Rosmah (with hubby in tow) was feted.

A word on the source for the content below. Wendy Brandes is not your typical blogger on Malaysian affairs. I think “complete outsider” would perhaps be apt.

I have no way of verifying the veracity of her eyewitness account, but some time researching the internet suggests she is not some fake teller of tales.

This makes the following observations even more disturbing than it would be normally, although you should really read the whole (amusing) article:

Warning: If Oscar-winning actor Jamie Foxx and the prime minister of Malaysia are dancing on stage together, move aside quickly. Ladies in pink head scarves will cut a bitch who gets in the way of their picture-taking.

I learned this the hard way on Friday at a dinner at The St. Regis hotel in honor of the first lady of Malaysia, or, as I call her for short, “Her Excellency Datin Paduka Seri Rosmah Mansor.” She was receiving the “International Peace and Harmony Inaugural Award 2010.” I accepted an invitation from my Malaysian designer friend Zang Toi, who was presenting a few gowns during the cocktail hour. It was only the day before the event that I took another look at the invitation and realized the gown presentation came during an “Islamic Fashion Festival.”

Much to my surprise, the Malaysian event wasn’t a typical awards dinner. It was like a wedding, bar/bat mitzvah, Sweet 16 and quinceanera all rolled up into one. I was awestruck. Jamie Foxx was the host and fully deserves an all-expenses-paid trip to Malaysia for his hard work. The music included the always-excellent Boys Choir of Harlem (who all looked like they were in their mid-30s, as Jamie pointed out, calling them the “Boys-to-Men Choir”); pop star Leona Lewis; and more traditional wedding-type singers.

Security scolded me for taking this iPhone picture of Leona Lewis.

When the magic hour of 10 P.M. rolled around, and we hadn’t even been served an entree, I decided to throw caution to the wind and stay. Good thing I did because Jamie Foxx was THE emcee of all time, managing to:

- perform a flirty karaoke version of “You’ve Got a Friend” with Her Excellency Datin Paduka Seri Rosmah Mansor;

- dance with Malaysia’s prime minister, which made the head-scarf-wearing ladies GO WILD;

- drag Robert De Niro, Charlize Theron, Emmy Rossum and a host of others onstage for “We Are the World”;

- run to all the front tables, exhorting us to, “Put your hands in the air!”

OO

CBS Reporter Kaylee Hartung adds some observations:

What an apt question :P

Also, TNG:

According to one Twitter posting by a DJ, known as DJ Irie, who parties with Hollywood stars, Foxx and Rosmah rehearsed for their duet before the party.

Now. You know many people couldn’t call me a prude with a straight face (Urbanscapes), but… I mean…. this is the head of state we’re talking about here. The No. 1 and his wife.

I think, under such circumstances, the word ‘debauchery’ might fit the bill.

Dancing with Jamie Foxx? Singing “a flithy karaoke version of You’ve Got a Friend”?? Practising it beforehand???

I almost can’t imagine (And perhaps that’s a blessing).

Ok, visceral response aside, there are some serious questions here.

So, we’re talking Robert DeNiro, Leona Lewis, Jamie Foxx, Charlize Theron, Emmy Rossum, etc, at a dinner ‘to honour the First Lady of Malaysia’.

How many of those people knew where Malaysia is?

Right.

So. What were they doing at this dinner?

Of course, of course, because they were moved to tears by the charitable work of Her Excellency Datin Seri Paduka Rosmah Mansor.

What? You don’t believe me? They were just paid a huge sum of money to be there you say? My my, how cynical of you to suggest such things, sir.

Where does it all end, friends?

Petrol and sugar more expensive for even the poorest of the rakyat, Penans walking two days to see Najib (instead of Najib going to them), and somehow, we’re throwing millions – possibly billions – at APCO, QGA, Laurus and other Washington-slickers, so that Rosmah can sing dirty karaoke with Jamie Foxx.

Where does it end?